As parents, we’re often more practiced talking to our daughters about body image than our sons. And as a society, we still hear a lot more about girls’ struggles with appearance, even though the issues facing boys are just as real—and growing.

Social media, porn, Looksmaxxing, peer comparison, depression, gym culture, skin—it all plays a part. But boys aren’t usually given the words (or the space) to talk about it.

We’ve known for a while now that social media affects mental health. What’s new is just how deeply it’s impacting boys. A 2024 study found that nearly two-thirds of teen boys say social media makes them feel worse about their appearance. Many spend more than five hours a day on it—some, closer to eight. That’s a lot of time being fed unrealistic ideals and filtered perfection.

I’ve tried to give the topic some airtime in our house. When I first raised it with my sons, they were hesitant. They didn’t just avoid the conversation—they didn’t seem to have the language for it. They could say they wanted to “get big,” but not why. (“Just because” doesn’t count, boys.)

Still, their actions said plenty: lifting weights, obsessing over protein, cutting carbs, managing their skin. They clearly care—but don’t connect that with “body image.” And they’re not alone. Recent research shows that over 80% of adolescent boys feel unhappy with their bodies. Nearly half are using protein supplements, and many are experimenting with risky enhancers like SARMs. Eating disorders in boys are rising, too—but often go unnoticed because the signs don’t look the same as in girls. I have both, and they are entirely different!

So, what can we do to help?

YoungMinds (a brilliant teen mental health resource) offers some great, doable advice:

1. Help them focus on what their body can do, not just how it looks.

Try making a list of strengths together—physical, emotional, otherwise. It helps shift the conversation.

2. Model positive self-talk.

Say things like “Thanks legs, for getting me through the day.” I’ve done this with my daughter forever; only recently realized I should do it with my sons, too. (And myself.)

3. Curate their online space (while you still can).

Encourage them to follow accounts that show real, diverse bodies—not just the filtered, gym-obsessed kind. I wish I’d done more of this early on with my boys—before I was banned from touching their phones.

4. Remind them it’s okay to get help.

If things feel off, talk to someone—whether it’s a coach, counselor, or therapist. The more we normalize this, the better.

It’s not always easy to bring this stuff up. I still get eye rolls. But I keep trying. That seems to matter.

Would love to hear how it’s going in your house. Are your boys open to these conversations? What’s helped? What hasn’t?

Let’s keep the conversation going.